28th September 2007

Bambi and Thumper

Two shy and timid creatures have found each other in safe companionship….. Photographer travels the world photographing animals and is well known. Had just returned from a long trip when he spotted these adorable little guys in his backyard. He set up a camera on his porch and wound up getting award winning photos in his own back yard!! Through the lens of Tanja Askani in Alberta Canada

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Sometimes friends come from unexpected places, but they are life’s most special gift!
Have a wonderful day my friend.

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posted in For Friends, Funny Animals, So Sweet | 0 Comments

28th September 2007

I’m Totally Chocolate Cake With Chocolate Icing!!

Now don’t cheat on this one, go with the first dessert you choose!
If all of the eight desserts listed below were sitting in front of you, which would you choose (sorry, you can only pick one)!
Trust me…this is very accurate. Pick your dessert, and then look to see what psychiatrists think about you.

After taking this dessert personality test, send
this e-mail on to others, but when you do, be sure to put your choice of dessert in the subject box above.

ALSO, SEND IT TO THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU.

DON’T FORGET TO CHANGE YOUR DESSERT CHOICE IN THE SUBJECT BOX BEFORE YOU FORWARD IT.

Here are your choices:

1. Angel Food Cake

2. Brownies

3. Lemon Meringue Pie

4. Vanilla Cake With Chocolate Icing

5. Strawberry Short Cake

6. Chocolate Cake With Chocolate Icing

7. Ice Cream

8. Carrot Cake

No, you can’t change your mind once you scroll down, so think carefully what your choice will be.

OK - Now that you’ve made your choice,
this is what the researchers say about you…

SCROLL DOWN—No Cheating

1. ANGEL FOOD CAKE — Sweet, loving,
cuddly. You love all warm and fuzzy items. A little nutty at times. sometimes you need an ice cream cone at the end of the day. Others perceive you as being childlike and immature at times.

2. BROWNIES — You are adventurous, love
new ideas, and are a champion of underdogs and a slayer of dragons. When Tempe flare up you whip out your saber. You are always the oddball with a unique sense of humor and direction. You tend to be very loyal.

3. LEMON MERINGUE — Smooth, sexy, &
articulate with your hands, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher. But don’t try to walk and chew gum at the same time. A bit of a diva at times, but you have many friends.

4. VANILLA CAKE WITH CHOCOLATE ICING –
Fun-loving, sassy, humorous, not very grounded in life; very indecisive and lacking motivation. Everyone
enjoys being around you, but you are a
practical joker. Others should be cautious in making you mad. However, you are a friend for life.

5. STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE — Romantic,
warm, loving. You care about other people, can be counted on in a pinch and expect the same in return.
Intuitively keen. Can be very emotional.

6. CHOCOLATE CAKE WITH CHOCOLATE ICING
– Sexy; always ready to give and receive Very creative, adventurous, ambitious, and passionate.
You can appear to have a cold exterior
but are warm on the inside. Not afraid to take chances. Will not settle for anything average in life. Love to laugh.

7. ICE CREAM — You like sports, whether
it be baseball, football, basketball, or soccer. If you could, you would like to participate, but you enjoy watching sports. You don’t like to
give up the remote control. You tend to be self-centered and high
maintenance.

8. CARROT CAKE — You are a very fun
loving person, who likes to laugh.
You are fun to be with. People like to
hang out with you. You Are a very warm hearted person and a little quirky at times. You have many loyal friends.

SEND TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS….INCLUDING ME!
DON’T FORGET - PUT YOUR CHOICE OF DESSERT IN “SUBJECT BOX” ABOVE BEFORE YOU FORWARD

LIFE IS NOT MEASURED BY THE BREATHS WE TAKE, BUT BY THE MOMENTS THAT TAKE OUR BREATH AWAY

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posted in Chain Emails, Personality Quiz | 1 Comment

28th September 2007

The polite way to go to the bathroom

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners,
asked her students the following question:

Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,
how
would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom ?

Michael said, Just a minute I have to go pee ………………….

The teacher responded by saying, That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it ?

Sherman said, I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll
be
right back ……………………

That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at
the
dinner table.

And you little Edward, can you use your brain for once and show us your
good
manners ????

“I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment ? I have
to
shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce
you to
after dinner.”

The teacher fainted …………………….

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posted in A Little Raunchy, Careful at Work & Around Kiddies, For Teachers | 8 Comments

28th September 2007

Dr. Phil’s Test

Below is Dr. Phil’s test. (Dr. Phil scored 55; he did this test on Oprah - she got a 38.) Some folks pay a lot of money to find this stuff out! Read on, this is very interesting!

Don’t be overly sensitive! The following is pretty accurate and it only takes 2 minutes. Take this test for yourself and send it to your friends. The person who sent it placed their score in the e-mail subject box. Please do the same before forwarding to your friends (send it back to the person who sent it to you.) Don’t peek, but begin the test as you scroll down and answer.

Answers are for who you are now — not who you were in the past. Have pen or pencil and paper ready.

This is a real test given by the Human Relations Dept. at many of the major corporations today. It helps them get better insight concerning their employees and prospective employees. It’s only 10 Simple questions, so grab a pencil and paper, keeping track of your letter answers to each question.

Make sure to change the subject of the e-mail to read YOUR total. When you are finished, forward this to friends/family, and also send it to the person who sent this to you. Make sure to put YOUR score in the subject box.
Ready?? Begin.

>1. When do you feel your best?
>a) in the morning
>b) during the afternoon and early evening
>c) late at night
>
>2. You usually walk….
>a) fairly fast, with long steps
>b) fairly fast, with little steps
>c) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
>d) less fast, head down
>e) very slowly
>
>3. When talking to people you. …
>a) stand with your arms folded
>b) have your hands clasped
>c) have one or both your hands on your hips
>d) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
>e) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair
>
>4. When relaxing, you sit with. …. .
>a) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
>b) your legs crossed
>c) your legs stretched out or straight
>d) one leg curled under you
>
>5. When something really amuses you, you react with…
>a) big appreciated laugh
>b) a laugh, but not a loud one
>c) a quiet chuckle
>d) a sheepish smile
>
>6. When you go to a party or social gathering you…
>a) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
>b) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
>c) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed
>
>7. You’re working very hard, concentrating hard, and you’re interrupted…
>a) welcome the break
>b) feel extremely irritated
>c) vary between these two extremes
>
>8. Which of the following colors do you like most?
>a) Red or orange
>b) black
>c) yellow or light blue
>d) green
>e) dark blue or purple
>f) white
>g) brown or gray
>
>9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are…
>a) stretched out on your back
>b) stretched out face down on your stomach
>c) on your side, slightly curled
>d) with your head on one arm
>e) with your head under the covers
>
>10. You often dream that you are…
>a) falling
>b) fighting or struggling
>c) searching for something or somebody
>d) flying or floating
>e) you usually have dreamless sleep
>f) your dreams are always pleasant

POINTS:
>1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
>2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
>3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
>4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
>5. ( a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
>6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
>7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
>8. (a) 6 (b ) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
>9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e) 1
>10. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1
>Now add up the total number of points.

OVER 60 POINTS :! Others see you as someone they should “handle with care..” ;You’re seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don’t always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS : Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality; a natural leader, who’s quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once; someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate..

41 TO 50 POINTS : Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS : Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & = practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who’s extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

UNDER 21 POINTS : People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions & who doesn’t want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’ re boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren’t.

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posted in Personality Quiz | 0 Comments

28th September 2007

The Wheels of Life

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With this in mind, I bought myself a new scooter.
I wanted something that was easy on gas and could zip
me to the store and about town.
This seems to meet my EVERY need.

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I love it!

Remember:
Senior Citizens Are Valuable

We are more valuable than any of the younger generations:
We have silver in our hair.
We have gold in our teeth.
We have stones in our kidneys.
We have lead in our feet and.
We are loaded with natural gas

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posted in For Seniors | 0 Comments

28th September 2007

THE WORTH OF A WOMAN

One Flaw In Women

(you will see what it is in the end)

Women have strengths that amaze men.

They bear hardships and they carry burdens,

but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy

and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight! for what they believe in.

They stand up to injustice.

They don’t take “no” for an answer

when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel

and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about

a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member,

yet they are strong when they

think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss

can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They’ll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you

to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love.

They have the compassion and ideas.

They give moral support to their

family and friends.

Women have vital things to say

and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

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posted in For the Gentlemen, For the Ladies, Inspirational | 0 Comments

28th September 2007

Who knew?

1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The
Solvent dissolves adhesive.

2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a
Trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five
Minutes and wash clean.
The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew

3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean
Cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and
Kills germs.

4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting
Your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka
Disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.

5. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush, and then blot dry.

6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to
Cleanse the skin and tighten pores.

7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol
Cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth
Of healthy hair.

8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray bees or wasps to
Kill them.

9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziploc freezer
Bag and freeze for a slushy, refreshable ice pack for aches, pain or
Black eyes.

10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender
Flowers il the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the
Sun for three days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply
The tincture to aches and pains.

11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and
Back as a liniment.

12. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.

13 Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.

14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the
Urushiol oil from your skin.

15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth Allow your gums to absorb
Some of the alcohol to numb the pain.

And silly me. I’ve only been drinking the stuff!!!

=================================================

CHEERS

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posted in Just Plain Funny, Trivia | 0 Comments

25th September 2007

FOOTBALL IS KING!

You don’t have to live in the U.S. to know that FOOTBALL IS KING! But the game wouldn’t be complete without the cheerleaders, and here are some of footballs finest:

The LSU’S Golden Girls!

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The Alabama Crimsonettes

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The West Virginia Mountaineers

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posted in For the Gentlemen, For the Ladies, Funny Animals, Sports | 0 Comments

24th September 2007

MY LIVING WILL

Last night, my friend and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, “I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.”

She got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out my wine.

She’s such a bitch…..

posted in For the Ladies | 0 Comments

24th September 2007

Ten Year Old Blues

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A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.

“I don’t want to know,” the child said, bursting into tears. “Promise me you won’t tell me.”

Confused, the father asked what was wrong.

The boy sobbed, “When I was six, I got the ‘There’s no Easter Bunny’ speech.
At seven, I got the ‘There’s no Tooth Fairy’ speech.
When I was eight, you hit me with the ‘There’s no Santa’ speech.
If you’re going to tell me that grown-ups don’t really get laid, I’ll have nothing left to live for.”

posted in Careful at Work & Around Kiddies | 0 Comments

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